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Monday, June 26, 2006

One Out Of Three Ain't Good

Man, did the Brewers lay a couple of turds on Saturday and Sunday! That blew. At least they won the first game, which was nice, and I got a Frank White bobblehead on Saturday and a Kansas City Monarch hat on Sunday so it wasn’t a complete wash. That was pretty much my weekend…going to Brewers games. It was pretty fun, and I’m glad my wife was cool with me going to all three games since the Brewers only come in town about every 6 years. Anyway, here are my thoughts on my weekend at Kaufmann Stadium:

• Constant heckling is really stupid and very annoying. An occasional comment at a player is okay, as long as it is warranted and funny, but nine innings of unoriginal/unfunny comments about a player who is a great shape being fat is really annoying. We got to deal with that yesterday at the game, when some out-of-shape loser was calling Brewers All-Star left fielder Carlos Lee fat. And his comments were along the lines of, “Hey Carlos, you want a Twinkie?” and “I’ve got some nachos for you, Lee!” Funny shit, huh? I will wait a second for you to catch your breath, because that is golden…………Ready? Not yet. Okay, I’ll give you more time……….Now? Okay, good. Anyway, heckling is annoying, and if you heckle, just know that you aren’t funny and are bothering everyone around you. And if you’re there with friends and/or family, you are only embarrassing them. And basically you just look like a tremendous tool.
• If you’ve ever seen “Major League,” you know the line “Too high!” when the one guy hits a homer against the Indians. It was a pretty funny line in the movie. But the movie came out in 1989. I don’t think that I have been to a baseball game since 1989 when I didn’t hear someone say it at least once. Even yesterday’s game, when there were no home runs, I heard it three times. If you say that, just know that it’s no longer funny. It was probably funny up until 1992, maybe 1994 if you want to give it a five-year grace period, but that was still a dozen years ago. Let it go. Think of another movie line to steal from, or better yet, think of something creative on you own. But “Too high!” is just not funny anymore, especially on lazy fly balls to the right fielder, and really, really especially when you said it two innings earlier.
• Using a movie line out of context is also annoying. On Friday night, there were a ton of Brewers fans at the game. I would guess that the crowd was 60 percent Royals fans to 40 percent Brewers fans. Late in the game, with the Brewers winning 7-2, some knob sitting behind us yelled, “Brewers suck!” While that was pretty damn clever, I yelled, “Hey!” He said, “Um, you look like a banker!” (a comment paraphrasing a line from “Major League”). It didn’t make any sense (I was wearing a Brewers jersey), and it wasn’t funny, so I just said, “Um, yeah.” He later said a line from another baseball movie (I can’t remember right now, as memorable and funny as it was), but it also made no sense. I was half-expecting to hear him say, “There’s no crying in baseball!” and “Build it, and he will come.” Hell, I wouldn’t have been surprised to hear him say, “Let them play!” too. I don’t mind a funny line from a movie, but please use in the right context. Thank you.

Enough bitching from me. I’ve got shit to do, so I’ll try to blabber at you tomorrow. Later.


  • At 7:43 AM, Anonymous Doncock said…

    Sounds like someone is taking the series loss a little hard. Keep your chin up, Dan. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, and sometimes it rains. Think about that for awhile.

    Who are you calling a psycho!?


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