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Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Vote YES Or Die!!!

Here in the Kansas City Metro area, there are a lot of political ads on TV and radio right now about passing a bill in Jackson County, Missouri, to raise the sales tax to “Save Our Stadiums” or “Save Our Teams”. Basically the residents of Jackson County will have a sales tax added to fund renovations to Kaufmann and Arrowhead Stadium and build a rolling roof that will go over both stadiums. Well, the teams are really pulling out all the stops to get these taxes passed. The first thing that was announced was that the NFL will have Super Bowl 49 at Arrowhead Stadium, but only if the bill passes. Then it was announced that by Major League Baseball that the Kansas City Royals would get to host an All-Star game between 2010 and 2014, but again, only if the vote was passed for the taxpayers to foot the majority of the bill by the sales tax increase. Well, today, they are going to announce that Kansas City and Arrowhead Stadium will host a future NCAA Men’s Final Four, but yes, only if the stadiums get renovated with the rolling roof, all contingent all the passing of the tax bill.

Now for me, I don’t live in Jackson County and rarely shop in Jackson County, so the higher sales tax isn’t going to effect me much. I’d much rather they build a downtown stadium for the Royals, but really, I have no say. But what I do find funny is all the things that are being promised to Jackson County if the bill passes. Now these are only rumors, but I’ve also heard the following things were going to be promised to Jackson County if the voters vote to raise the sales tax:

• The White House, Senate, and Supreme Court will be moving to Independence, MO, if the rolling roof portion of the vote happens.
• Brangelina will move to KC and even adopt three Jackson County orphans if the bill passes.
• Research Medical Center will discover a cure for AIDS by 2015, but only if Arrowhead and Kaufmann Stadiums get more luxury suites.
• Osama bin Laden will turn himself in, but only if the bill passes and they have a restaurant at the stadiums that will be open 365 days a year.
• Kaufmann Stadium will get to host Scott Peterson’s execution.
• The Nelson-Atkins Museum of Art will get custody of the Da Vinci’s Mona Lisa, Van Gogh’s Sunflowers, Monet’s Waterlillies, and the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel.

So basically, the citizens of Jackson County would be morons to not vote “YES” on April 4th!

2 Comments:

  • At 10:44 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    There is also a rumor floating around that the Golden Gate Bridge will be moved to KC to replace the Broadway Bridge and that by having a rolling roof the Muddy Mo will become clean and fun place to go boating.

     
  • At 11:15 AM, Anonymous beeyatch said…

    I also heard that insteand of calling KC the "Armpit of America" they are going to call it the "Underarm of America"

     

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