How About Some More Crap You Can Read?

Here you can read about crap, stuff, or whatever you want to call whatever I write.

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

I Don't Believe In Talking While Pooping

Hey, how’s it going? I’m extremely fucking tired. We’re watching my in-laws’ dog, and just like the previous times we watched him, he started barking at 4:15 AM this morning to get fed. After feeding him, I didn’t really fall back to sleep, and I’m quite tired now. But at least I didn’t murder the dog. I think I deserve some credit for that.

Does this make me a bad person? I was just taking a piss in the bathroom, and some guy was taking a shit and got a phone call. He took the call and once he said hello I started to try to stop pissing, just so that the urinal would flush (it’s an automatic flusher) and that the person he was talking to would know he was on the shitter. Instead, the guy bolted out of the bathroom, without washing his hands, before I could completely stop and let it flush. Where normally I think I would be a bad person for wanting to make it flush for the pooping talker, I think my thoughts were eventually justified with him not washing his hands. It’s like I knew.

So Debra Lafave is claiming insanity in her case of having sex with a 14-year-old student. Where were the hot, crazy teachers when I was in school? I feel like my high school life was definitely lacking more so now. It’s not fair.

I debated putting this paragraph on the site, but here it goes. There is a movie coming out about a famous joke called “The Aristocrats”. It’s allegedly one of the dirtiest jokes around, and AMC Theatres have banned it from being shown on their screens. It is pretty filthy. Anyway, if any of you are interested, here is a link to that joke, as told by Cartman (warning: this isn’t “work-friendly, so use headphones or turn down your speakers): South Park “The Aristocrats Joke”. Enjoy, and have a great day.

6 Comments:

  • At 8:59 AM, Blogger JP said…

    The joy of "working" from home is that I CAN watch that at work.

    That was pretty stupidly funny stuff Fisty.

    Keep up the good work.

     
  • At 9:26 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I didn't get it........

     
  • At 10:39 AM, Blogger eatmisery said…

    Make sure you never borrow the guy's cell phone, since you don't know how many times he fled the bathroom without washing his hands prior!

     
  • At 11:34 AM, Blogger justrose said…

    hilarious! though i can't imagine leaving a bathroom without washing one's hands.

    thanks for that little unhygienic vignette ::reaches for travel bottle of purel::

     
  • At 6:00 AM, Blogger Maidink said…

    Not washing hands after a dump and on the cell phone? I hope the friggin call was worth it.

    the nasty ole thing

     
  • At 9:11 AM, Blogger Ga Georgia House Cleaning said…

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