How About Some More Crap You Can Read?

Here you can read about crap, stuff, or whatever you want to call whatever I write.

Friday, May 06, 2005

I Made Myself Even More Of A Jerk Over Nothing!

Sorry I haven’t written much lately, but I’ve been pretty busy at work. I hate letting you all down, but I had to get shit done. Anyway, I think it’ll be this way for a while, but I hope to still write for you bastards and bee-yotches.

Wanna know how pathetic of a loser I am (in case you don’t already know)? The other day I wrote that I might have a funny story for you on Thursday. Well, I didn’t, as I didn’t even write anything for you. Anyway, here was my thought going into Wednesday: We were supposed to go hang out with my wife’s friend from college, her husband, and a bunch of their friends. Well, I really like my wife’s friend and husband a lot. They are really cool and nice. But so far the friends haven’t really done much for me. It’s not that they’re jerks or anything (they’re actually pretty nice), but apparently I’m the most forgettable person in the world, because every time I meet them, at least a couple of them always say, “Nice to meet you,” to me, which wouldn’t be so bad if I hadn’t met them several times before. And it wasn’t like I had only just met them at huge keg parties either. One of the guys is a really nice guy who had acted like he never met me before, when I had met times that I think would be easy to remember, plus he knows my wife, and I’ve been with her for almost nine years now! One time was at my wife’s friend’s wedding, when I was the only non-bridal party member to ride the bus from the hotel to the church (because my wife incorrectly told me that was the only time it was going there) and I sat and bullshitted with all the groomsman on the bus and at the church while they were taking pictures. I think not being in the party and being on the bus and hanging out with everyone who was having their pictures taken would have made me a little noticeable. I also met him at a party in Denver with their friends where I had talked to him for a while. This was the guy who was getting with one of my wife’s roommates for a short period of time and we had hung out with back in college, before a big brew-ha-ha happened, so you’d think he might remember that time. So going into Wednesday night, I figured this was all going to happen again. I was going to show up with my wife, who everyone already knew, and these people were going to tell me how nice it was to meet me. Usually when this happens, I sort of take the Lester Burnham in “American Beauty” approach and just say, “Oh, we’ve met before….It's OK, I wouldn't remember me either,” and just go on. This time I was preparing myself for it. I was thinking of things to say when “Nice to meet you” was said. I think I finally decided on “Oh, we’ve met about a dozen times before, from your party in Denver, to their wedding, to the time when you were tapping (mystery person) and her ex-boyfriend busted in the room. What, you don’t remember that?” Okay, I wasn’t going to say that last part because I really do like that person a lot and wouldn’t drag her name into it and start any problems by being a rude jackass, but the first part I was planning on. Anyway, the get together ended up being my wife, me, the couple, and two of the friends (including the guy who I was referring to), but nothing came of it. I’m assuming because they probably gave them advance notice of my arrival since it was just the two of us and probably even said, “Oh, you’ve met him before several times,” because they’re good like that. So I went through all this trouble thinking of something to say, and it was all for nothing. Everyone was cool, like they always are, and I just got annoyed about past encounters for nothing. Oh well. I guess maybe I am an asshole.

I read that Audioslave (good band, terrible band name) will be playing a free concert in Havana tonight, making them the first band to play in Cuba since Castro has taken over. I think that’s pretty cool. For those of you who don’t know, Audioslave frontman Chris Cornell used to be the lead singer of Soundgarden, one of my favorite bands of all-time. I saw Soundgarden in concert a few times, and of all their performances, I think my favorite song they played was a cover of The Doors’ “Waiting for the Sun” when they played Lollapalooza the second time. I thought that was pretty cool, but I have a feeling that if Audioslave plays any covers tonight, they won’t be playing Urge Overkill’s “Sister Havana”. Although I think that’d be kinda cool if they did.

Well, have a great weekend. Mine should be busy. Happy Mother’s Day to all you mothers out there (especially my wife, mom, and mother-in-law), and I’ll try to check back in on Monday. XOXOXOXO!!!


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